It was a dark and stormy night…
After a few weeks of very dry weather, we finally received some rain, accompanied by lightning and thunder. It wasn’t scary, loud thunder that shook my house. It was more that rumbly, distant kind of thunder that can be relaxing, almost musical, to hear. I love this kind of storm and the way it can lull me to sleep. But the other night was a different story.
After trying to sleep for a while with no success, I got out of bed and went downstairs to read for a while. I thought I might even attempt to write a blog post. My mind has been both full and empty recently; full of conflicted thoughts and empty of anything worthwhile to write about. At least, it has felt that way.
As usual, when I got up, the dog got up with me. Once settled in on our comfy couch, though, he was back to sleep soon enough. I envied him for his ability to rest so peacefully.
Since it had been a while since I wrote a blog post and ideas were not coming to me, I retrieved a book from my shelf in hopes that it would spark meaningful thoughts that I could share.
I was not in a good place for writing, because every writing prompt I looked at and thought about seemed to have some sort of painful memory attached to it. Recent conversations have opened old wounds and have made new ones. I’ve found myself confronted by a kind of hate I was unprepared to face.
Writing, or speaking, the truth, is not always nice, or pleasant or pretty. But it shouldn’t be hateful. We all have opinions, and we all have a right to express them. And if people choose to be hateful, I guess they have that right as well.
By the same token, we have the right to minimize our exposure to the hate, even if it comes from within our own family or “friends”. Gracious God, help me to hand over to You my pain and my anger, and to keep handing it over until I can leave it with You once and for all. Soothe the tempest that threatens me. I come to You with open hands and a broken heart. Fill me so full of Your love that there’s no room for anything else—Amen.